MY RIGHT EYE HURTS REALLY BAD

It feels like I was accosted by Dale Gribble and his patented Pocket Sand technique. I'm crying out of my right eye and it burns so much. I think I have eye cancer. It was nice knowing you all RIP me.

It's probably not eye cancer since you'd have a lot of symptoms leading up to it. Did you look up blue waffles or something?

By the way, don't look up blue waffles or you'll get eye cancer like Trollestia-senpai. Or some kind of trauma induced blindness. Probably the latter. I'm only half joking on that.

Wow Freeze you're a horrible human being.
It's a good thing I know what blue waffles is or else I really would have looked that up.

I aim to please.

I figured that giving it a connotation with eye cancer and the cause of your eye pain would be enough of a hint that it's something that shouldn't be looked up, but I suppose you're right in that the internet is the last place to pick up contextual cues.

I guess I'll make up for it by giving a warning or something.

I wasn't serious about you being horrible but your reason for editing is gold.